Sleep Tight, Don't let the Bedbots Bite
by Sqwii
Summary: A Drabble based on a gift fic of a fancomic of a fanfic... Read Juxtaposition and Dreaming of Who? by Vaeru first.
1. Bedbots Bite

Disclaimer: Transformers is owned by HasTek. Evelyn, Juxtaposition, and Dreaming of Who? Belong to Vaeru. Cafei owns herself. Juxtaposition-based drabble.

Read Juxtaposition and Dreaming of Who? First.

**Sleep Tight, Don't let the Bedbot Bite.**

_**"**Once I dreamed I was a butterfly, and now I no longer know whether I am Chuang Tzu, who dreamed I was a butterfly, or whether I am a butterfly dreaming that I am Chuang Tzu." _

-**Chuang Tzu**

Evelyn sat wrapped in her makeshift blanket, eyes wide and glassy, slowly rocking herself back and forth.

"Are you malfunctioning?" asked Ratchet, after a quick scan only revealed low energy levels.

Evelyn stopped rocking and after a long pause lifted her blank stare to the worried medic.

"I may never sleep again."

Did you have another odd dream about the dark haired female?

"No..." whimpered Evelyn with newly awakened horror. "I dreamt that I was possessed by Sunstreaker instead of Sideswipe."

**Author's note**: I was thinking about what it would be if someone else had crashed into Evelyn.

After pondering about Evelyn being made into road pizza by Ironhide or Optimus Prime {Starscream's Roadside Bar ~ "You kill 'em, we grill 'em!"} and wondering how long it would take them to buff the dent out. That got me thinking about the other Twin.


	2. I need Advice

-1

Disclaimer: Transformers is owned by HasTek. Evelyn, Juxtaposition, and Dreaming of Who? Belong to Vaeru. Tyra banks owns America's Next Top Model. Project Runway is belongs to Bravo. Martha Stewart owns herself.

Read Juxtaposition and Dreaming of Who? First.

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**Shrink**

"_Whenever I hear the sparrow chirping, watch the woodpecker chirp, catch a chirping trout, or listen to the sad howl of the chirp rat, I think: Oh boy! I'm going insane again." _

_~ **Jack Handy**_

A smartly dressed woman stood in the doorway, one arm covered in a fashionable scarf. The effect was slightly ruined as she stomped in and flopped down in the chair across the desk.

"Ms. Evelyn Hughes?" Said the Doctor.

"Yes."

"It says here that you've been hearing voices."

"ONE. One voice, dear God, that is more then enough." said Evelyn with just a hint of snarl in her voice.

" Does this voice want you to hurt anyone or yourself?"

"It gives fashion advice."

"Whh…at?," sputtered the Doctor incredulously.

" Fashion advice, I have spent most of my recovery watching Tyra Banks' America's Next Top Model, Project Runway, and Martha Stewart marathons.," Evelyn said tonelessly.

"Why would you do that ?"

"The voice said that if it had to be stuck in a disgusting Squishy, then it would have to be the best looking one."

"Squishy." said the Doctor deadpan.

"Yeah. Can you please just tell it that I don't look good in yellow, sorry, Goldenrod…"

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**Author's note:** Thanks for the Reviews Elita One and "Stripperella"


	3. When the cat is away

-1Disclaimer: Transformers is owned by HasTek. Evelyn, Juxtaposition, and Dreaming of Who? Belong to Vaeru. Tuna song by Mephiskapheles.

Read Juxtaposition and Dreaming of Who? First.

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**… The mice will play.**

"_The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The guy who invented the other three, HE was a genius."_

_-Sid Caesar_

"Maybe we should wait until Ratchet comes out of recharge for me to test this." muttered Evelyn. Wheeljack gazed at her with sad puppy eyes.

"I made sure it has all your nutritional needs for the entire day. Besides didn't you want to try something new other then your regular food cubes?"

"Fine I'll try it" sighed Evelyn.

Wheeljack grinned and brought over an energon cube filled with his new invention, a drinkable form of his food cubes. Evelyn glanced at the drunk. 'It looks innocent enough.' she thought to herself. It kind of looked like water but had a faint purple shine to it almost like the sheen of oil. Evelyn hesitantly reached down to scoop some up in the palm of her had.

'What do you think about this?' she asked Sunstreaker.

Sunstreaker snarled out 'I bet that when we explode they will be cleaning us off the walls for the next vorn.'

Ignoring his ominous muttering, Evelyn decided to just go for it and take a sip.

"It tastes like water with just a hint of sweetener" said Evelyn both surprised and relieved.

"So you like it then?" asked Wheeljack.

"Yes," smiled Evelyn, "You did well."

"I guess it's time for you to go socialize in the rec room." said Wheeljack, when she had drunk her fill.

"Yep!" chirped Evelyn her eyes suspiciously glossy.

As Wheeljack held Evelyn in the palm of his hand he failed to notice as she started swaying form side to side as if she was dancing to a tune only she could hear. The observer would have been even more surprised if they were to enter into her head to see just who was supplying her with her dancing music. Sunstreaker, more relaxed then he had ever been, was singing. The song was about how much better he was then everyone else, set to the tune of "I Feel Pretty".

All was right with her world, when Evelyn looked past the door into the rec room to find Jazz and Bumblebee at their usual table. "Hello," was what Evelyn wanted to say, but what she said sounded more like "Your colors are very pretty. I can find you in a snowstorm." Everyone stared at her, Wheeljack pausing as he went to place her down on the table.

"Did she just glitch?" asked Bumblebee, as he quickly reached out to catch Evelyn, saving her from a painful belly flop as she jump off of Wheeljack's hand screaming Wheeee at the top of her lungs.

Jazz looked seconds from breaking out into laughter as he asked " Wheeljack, what happened?"

"Well," began Wheeljack sheepishly, "I was modifying her food into liquid form, but I think I might have intensified it too much."

"Intensified?" asked Bumblebee as he watched Evelyn pretend to swim across his palm. "You mean you made organic high-grade?"

Any answer Wheeljack might have given him went unheard when Evelyn decided she had "swum" far enough.

"Bumblebee, where do you keep your tuna?" asked Evelyn as she drifted from one side to the other.

"…My what?"

"It's an organic organism that lives in earth's oceans" wheezed out Jazz as he started to laugh.

"You know," said Evelyn seriously. "Yum yum Bumble, Bumblebee Tuna. I Love Bumblebee, Bumblebee Tuna. Yum yum Bumble, Bumblebee Tuna. I love a sandwich made with Bumblebee." She sung. "The best tuna in the sea. Is the tuna we call Bumblebee. The best tuna in the sea. Is the tuna we call Bumblebee."

The whole time she was singing Evelyn had been making the hand motions for _itsy bitsy spider _and was midway though the _I'm a little tea pot _dance when Jazz finally scooped her out of a very startled Bumblebee's hands.

"We should take her back to Ratchet." he said turning to Wheeljack.

Evelyn, in her own little world, as she pointed to the hands that cradled her, screeched "Jazz hands." Then she raised her hands and started to dance.

"You're probably right, Jazz" said Wheeljack staring amusedly at Evelyn as she danced like a wild-thing in Jazz's hands. "She is definitely over-energized"

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A cool draft woke Evelyn. She stared up at the bright lights in the med bay; the last thing she remembered was trying out Wheeljack's new drink. She felt a bit fuzzy and bleary as she "poked" at Sunstreaker who was still sleeping. 'Wait a minute,' she thought to herself. 'Why do I feel a draft?' She quickly sat up ignoring the slight feeling of vertigo as the blood rushed to her head.

"Why am I wearing a toga? She asked herself out loud. "And where are my clothes."

"Ah" said Ratchet, a slightly annoyed mostly amused look (glare #4- "Oh Primus, what did I do to deserve such stupid patients", not to be confused with the #12 glare of "If only I had a wrench small enough") on his faceplates. "Lord Cesar awakes"

A sinking feeling of dread overcame her at those words, though it could have been brought about by the still snickering Jazz and nervous looking Wheeljack, complete with a new dent, standing off to one side.

"What Happened?" She wailed.

"Well." said Wheeljack hesitantly. "It all started when Sunstreaker…"

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**Authors note: **I like writing but my Muse has got to stop giving me ideas at bedtime…I feel so tired.

Til next time, Love ya!


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